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Mental Health

Urge Surfing: Helpful for overcoming the urge to doomscroll.

My Experiences on Different Mental Health Medications:

Medication	Dosage	How Often	Time Taken
Buproprion XL	150-300mg/SR 100mg	1x/morning	5 years (2019-2024)
Hydroxyzine	15-25mg	3x/day max, as-needed	6 years (2019-present)
Mirtazipine	15-30mg	1x/night	~2 years (2023-present)
Quetiapine	50mg	1x/night	<1 year (don't rember)
Adderall IR	5-10mg	1x	<1 year
Atomoxetine	18-25mg	1x/morning	<1 year (2024-present)
Gabapentin	100mg	3x/day max, as-needed	<1 year (2024-present)

Buproprion XL/SR: My first and longest medication. I took it for 5 years. It helped me focus on my digital art and pull my life back together during a very difficult time. This plus special interest allowed me to draw for hours at a time. Reduced my appetite, which was dangerous for me at that time. However, eating became easier when I wasn't stressed from other factors. After a few years, the muscle spasms and jerkiness set in. I'm sensitive to that sort of thing, so I stopped. Switching to a lower dose of SR gave me annoying blurry eyes, presumably because SR gives you more medication at one time than XL does. Increases anxiety, but makes it easier to get up in the morning.
Hydroxyzine: Eepy. Reduces anxiety, increases drowsiness, but not in a way that's immediately noticeable. Incompatible with other antihistamines like cetirizine, as combining antihistamines can lead to antihistamine toxicity.
Mirtazipine: My beloved! Helps me eat, helps me sleep, even at my larger dose of 30 mg. I noticed few antidepressant effects. Unique in that a smaller dose makes you sleepier, but a larger dose works better for eating and antidepressant effects. First starting on it felt like there was lead in my legs.
Quetiapine: Don't remember the exact dosage, but I suspect it was low, as I'd just started it. Lead-in-legs. It made me too sleepy, all the time, and for that I stopped it pretty quickly.
Adderall IR: Named as such because the generic name is too long. Instant release made me feel blessedly normal and quiet in my brain for 20 minutes or so. Almost tired. My body stopped twitching, and I was able to listen to a friend's story without staring around or shifting too much. Felt it less the second time I took it.
Atomoxetine: Helps me focus, although it doesn't help with energy.
Gabapentin 100mg: Prescribed since I can't take hydroxyzine anymore, and I find it about as effective. More euphoric. Easier to feel, and quicker to set in. A higher dose will send me to sleep and make me loopy when I wake up, but this hasn't been true for smaller doses. At 300mg, I start getting drowsy and 'high.'